Police, Thieves and Merchants Chapter 5: Can Will Must

Can Will Must

Sandra stared hard at the thief's hand edging toward his knife as he stared towards where his thieving comrades had disappeared into the thick, green habitat surrounding him.

She wondered if Kendra's plan would work as she moved slowly to a poised position at the edge of the clearing.

“How will I get rid of him now that she's left him behind?”she pondered. Her mind flitted to possibilities and managed to get distracted. She thought of how much easier it would be if she had the power to bring down lightning. She could get rid of the threat with one smashing strike. However then there would be the potential damage to the injured merchant to consider, as well as herself and anyone else in the forest. Would it be possible for the lighting to cause a fire? If so how long would it take for it to spread? Would she have time to put it out or would she have to peg it? Possibly grabbing the merchant and dragging him along. Could she bear to leave a living, innocent man to face the raging inferno she had created?

The sharp hiss of steel brought her mind back to the present. How long had she lost focus? The thief held the knife over the merchant, a sneer on his lips.

“Too bad you won't tell us where to go, it was a simple question.”

“The north! The north! There are tons of cities in the north! Just keep heading that way and you'll be able to find someone who knows better.”

“Too vague... too... vague, we might as well kill you on sight for such useless information.”

Sandra was breathing harder, she couldn't believe she'd lost concentration! As her confidence flickered she forced herself to strengthen her resolve. She can do this. She will. She must.

The stone arced through the air and fizzed behind the thief's head only to crash into the bracken on the far side of the open area. The thief was alert at once and turning towards the sound, knife warily waving out in front of him. Sandra was off as soon as she threw the stone, bare feet skipping across the ground, breath shallow in her ears.

Inside her mind she was praying that he wouldn't turn round. It was such a simple trick but it could work as long as she was quick, silent and unrelenting. Her foot snagged a thorn and lip tightened a the thief yelled

“Who goes there?! Come and face me!” Raw power and aggression evident in his voice, with arm open as if in welcome to an attack. The merchant on the ground gasped as the thief was struck hard against his skull. Sandra felt the juddering, crunching blow through her arm at the impact of her blunt weapon. The thief saw white and staggered but managed to whip round the knife sawing at the air. The stick cracked and broke once again against the thief's head. Sandra had managed to anticipate and circle around the knife's path as she moved in for her attack. As the thief fell sprawling onto the floor Sandra went to her pack to remove her irons and lock him up. She hurried, having no idea how successful Kendra had been. Once done she grabbed the merchant and left the clearing leaving the thief locked up in the centre. She had no time to escort the villain to Batesmoor but if Kendra did come back they could take the thieves, the wine and the merchant together. However, if Kendra had failed and potentially had been killed Sandra was losing potential running time by waiting. The merchant was wheezing next to her, occasionally questioning why they weren't running. Sandra waited and listened to the sounds of the forest. A bird calling to it's mate among the treetops and a rustle to her left as a small mammal moved through the debris from a fallen tree. There was no sound of a return by Kendra or the thieves yet. She stopped and waited to see the consequences of her decision. She could only wait a few minutes.

Kendra sprinted through the undergrowth, wine under her arm. She didn't need the thieves to follow her far, just a few hundred yards to seal their demise. Unfortunately, they were proving better sprinters than she would have guessed and were hurtling after her down the path. The closest had a knife drawn with a look part of hunger, part of fury on his face. His long gangly legs producing heavy footfalls that resounded around Kendra's head as she ran. The second was just a step behind him as far as she could tell, his pace more considered more measured. As she glanced back however she saw the look of fury on him too.

“Good,” thought Kendra as the gap between them closed further and further. Their heavy breathing just behind spurred her on as they scrabbled and jumped down the cluttered and unpredictable forest path. She jumped over a particularly hazardous root and landed well, only to hear a pursuer come jumping over a second later. They were almost upon her! She zig-zagged as the nearest made a lurch for her feeling the knife whistle past dangerously close to her back. She twisted away and stumbled against a solid rock or root hidden under the carpet of leaves. She fell backwards watching as a look of triumph emerged across the thief's face. She gasped aloud as the thief made a second lunge. At that moment her foot kicked out catapulting her to the side of the path. The thief's momentum carried him forward, past the point where she fell to launch head first forward through the blanket of leaves that covered the trap below. The second thief was a moment behind cartwheeling his arms as the depth of the trap was revealed to him. Kendra had quickly bounced back from her fake fall to pivot round with arms planted on the edge of the trap and feet spiralling round to kick the remaining thief in the backside and send him sprawling into his comrade below.

Band Watching 2.0

Band Watching

So this is the blog post where I point out some bands that I've enjoyed on our many great journeys gigging across the entire of... Sheffield, so far. While none of these bands have agreed to do the lawnmower dance with me they did pay some great music, and I guess that's something to look for in a band as well? To be clear though, when another band does the lawnmower they will be the highlight of this list.

Frank Grimes and the Disasters

I suspect these guys may be fans of American cartoons for some reason.... I love the name and I enjoyed the music when they joined us in supporting Courage my Love at Corporation in November. Their tunes are catchy pop punk- right up my street, and very singable- I wished I knew the lyrics when we saw them perform live but I had to make do with saying “something something something” over and over. It's refreshing to know that there is a pop punk band like this so close to us (based in Barnsley) that I can follow. Check out their youtube channel for music and lyrics videos of their songs.... https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCVBROfMFgtLoeO0ykkby5gg

Ample Funk

Funky, funky, funksters. I'm not sure if funksters is a word, probably not, but these guys deserve the title as they provide exactly what their name suggests with ample amount of funk. I literally could not stop my knee jerking to the sound of the bass as they played through their set at the Washington, keeping me mesmerized throughout. They fortunately have uploaded some of their funky songs onto youtube so everyone can enjoy the funkiness.. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiX-Hy2fJOl136ELUPB5Yvg

Idle Gentlemen

Finally idle gentlemen, who I also saw at our Washington gig, were very stylish on stage and also played some groovy rock music. I especially enjoyed the powerful vocals but the entire band kept me very much entertained- very easy to head bang too. They also have a youtube and soundcloud where you can check out some of their super cool tunes.. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFarWdCFYdrInZ4mYYxrqKg/videos

https://soundcloud.com/idlegentlemen

That's it for the blog this week, check back for more band watching; dance moves; lyrics explaining or rages against the system of clowns that keep balloons enslaved to the ground.

Katamari!

Now, I'm going to review something completely random because what the hell, no-one
reads this anyway, except Kate and random internet surfer called Steve. Hi Kate and Steve.

What I shall review is musically related and introduced to me by some bearded bloke
that likes to hang around my house. It is called 'Katamari'. Now, I know that sounds
Japanese but it is actually.. even more Japanese than it sounds. It is a
very bizarre and creative video game series that is well worth a play that has a superb soundtrack.
Well at least the 'We Love Katamari' game does, as that is the only one I've heard,
but I'm sure the rest are awesome too.

Now, "what makes this soundtrack so good?," I hear you murmur inquisitively to yourself.
Many reasons. It introduces you to about 5 musical genres you had no idea existed, and
gets you hooked to them before you can even define what they are. It makes you question whether
you are actually insane, in a happy way. You WILL listen to Katamari on the Swing multiple times,
that is just a fact of life, no-one has listened to that just once.. ever. I for one couldn't stop myself
drumming to that one and instantly wished I was better at swing drumming. Also, nearly every single song has a distinct genre from the rest, it is ridiculously varied.
Here is my attempt to describe the genres with my limited knowledge going from start to finish:

Pokemon Rock -> Footage from the Beat-boxing Word Championship --> Lounge--> Swing --> Psychedelic Techno Madness --> Pop Punk --> Chill Rock-->Blues? --> Double Blues --> Chill as Fuck Rock --> Experimental beyond Genres --> Some form of Rock I have no idea, Math Rock?--> Anime Soundtrack --> Disco --> Literally Animals --> Orchestral --> Fanfare
--> Words

Check it out below for an interesting experience and see if you can define what the hell each song is and comment your observations:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ntd4FPQJX1w&t=4062s

Police, Thieves and Merchants - Chapter 4 Creeping With Malice

Sedrick could smell pie. He was gliding between the few outbuildings at the edge of the larger buildings which made up the settlement. Despite the settlement being relatively small, the buildings stood tall and provided excellent coverage from anyone watching at the top of the grassy embankment that rose up to the rear of the village. He crouched behind one such out-building with his back pressed against the smooth wooden surface. His body faced the forest to the rear of the buildings but his eyes pointed towards an open window to this right.

The pie was delivering it's sweet, delicious aroma from a window sill just a quick dash away across a short gap between the buildings. He listened. There wasn't much activity in the settlement but he had distinguished low muttering earlier and the clang of a door as someone went into an outbuilding. The buildings were eerily quiet even when put into consideration how few people could live in such a small number of them.

However, there was the pie. It looked delicious, smelled delicious with a hint of blueberry – an ultimate bonus in Sedrick's opinion. Why people would leave these things out exposed for someone to steal he would never know. But also there was the pie. It was too tempting. There were some little thoughts unfurling within his mind that there was no way it could taste as good as it smelled. It could be poisoned, it could be a trap set by some mundane lunatic designed to lure him in. He breathed in. His anxious mind liked to get away from him, it took a rumble in his belly and footsteps coming from round the corner behind him to push him back into action. He skipped across the clearing, making minimal noise, as his feet bounced across the ground. He had grabbed the pie and ducked down between two buildings within a few seconds of hearing the danger.

The man who came striding round the corner created a striking impression. Firstly, he was clearly wealthy – much more so than anyone living in these quiet lands could hope to be. The clothing he wore was a deep green and shone with rich velvet trimmed lighter at the edges. His belt and boots were also a lighter shade of green and his hat was very intriguing. It stuck up slightly from the stranger's head in a sort of folded manner and had a feather sticking out of the top. Sedrick couldn't help raising an eyebrow slightly, he had never seen such clothes before but it was what the man was holding that really caught his eye. A tube-like device with a handle at the end held firmly in a strong grip with a finger curled into a small nook underneath the tube where it joined with the handle. Sedrick burrowed himself into a doorway as the interesting man passed, eyes always intent on his next action.

“Idiot,” he thought. “I've got your pie.” He took a bite, gorging himself on the sweet blueberry as it danced across his tongue. As the green man stepped away and the clear, resounding footsteps faded Sedrick finished his snack and rose slowly. He crept from his hiding place and continued moving, always sticking to the shadow of a building. For some reason there was a sense of threat about the place. Sedrick liked threat, it sent excitement and energy running through his blood and he liked the way that felt. He liked testing his anxiety and overpowering any fear he had. He also liked the hat. He had never seen such a thing before, though it looked slightly similar to some he'd seen far away by the sailors on the sea to the south of his home. He was just imagining what he would look like with it on when he bundled over a bundle on the floor. Pain sprouted from his left shoulder as he let out a small groan and rolled onto his side to gaze back at the bundle's sightless eyes staring back at him. A red line stretched across the throat where the garrotte had cut into her and her mouth lay open, a quizzical expression on her face as if wondering who he was to disturb her rest in the street.

“Dead.” He thought glumly. He got up and jumped back over the body with adrenaline running through him as he searched for the man in green.

His pace slowed as he got closer to the edge of the silent buildings, he saw his prey. Green man was stalking past the houses with tube device perched against his shoulder. He seemed beautifully distracted. Meanwhile a low, repetitive thunk started beyond the green man in the clearing close to the forest. Sedrick moved forward as the green man turned to go beyond the final outbuilding before the clearing. Sedrick himself closed on that final corner after watching his prey gradually edge through. He took off his shoe.

Sedrick darted around the corner and found the stranger pointing tube at a shifty-looking man with an axe. Sedrick lunged with the shoe. There was an explosion of noise from the tube as the woodcutter fell to the ground missing one head. Sedrick heard the unmistakeable panicked wails of his comrades as the green man's head recoiled back into his boot. Green man let out a bellow of rage as he turned and Sedrick whisked the hat off his reeling head. Anxiety flooded through him as his mind registered the danger in front of him. Grappling onto the small advantage of surprise he had gained he thrust out hard with the shoe before the green man could complete his turn, against the hand clutching the tube handle. As the tube fell to the ground Sedrick kicked with all his might with the foot still holding a shoe into the area never meant to endure such force. The green man let out another scream of rage and pain as he fell to the floor clutching his groin. Sedrick was quick to kick the tube device and sprint back through the settlement, intent on putting as much distance as he could between himself and the outraged, menacing sounds coming from the clearing. He reached the embankment behind the village quickly and immediately began climbing up the muddy slope, skidding and scrambling in his rush to get to the top. Every two or three seconds he risked a quick glance back to see if there were any tube shaped objects poking out from between the wooden buildings. Once he reached the top he didn't stop and kept running into the forest, practically falling into his pack's hiding place among the undergrowth and nearly breaking his wine. Stopping for a moment when he realised the pie had been left in the village he sighed and sprinted as fast as he could into the wonderfully dark and gloomy forest.

Blood spurted from the useless neck, now demoted to holding up nothing, as it slumped with the body down to the floor. Laurel ran, Borg let out a bellow and turned for cover and Crole stood frozen on the spot. It took him valuable seconds to process a single, desperate thought to sprint for the cover of the forest. This was enough time to make out Sedrick kick the killer in the balls and make off with his hat. The tree-line was dozens of metres away a long, long distance when considering the weapon they were fleeing. Borg and Laurel had each made off in different directions and all Crole could think to do was sprint anywhere that put him further from the killer device. His heart pounded the blood through his body and his feet to the floor at a ridiculous pace as he gradually made the cover of the trees. A slight tingle of relief was allowed to flow through his body as he made it. Immediately he angled his path away from the village and deeper into the wildlife.

Borg was wheezing, bent double over and leaning against a tree when Crole disturbed him. Their eyes met briefly as they shared a mixed look of shock and horror for a single second before they began careering through the undergrowth at a terrific pace. Up ahead they could hear the terrified wails of Laurel as he struggled past obstacles nature was throwing up against him. It took a minute for them to reach him on the floor, a new gash drawn across his cheek where a branch had raked his face.

“Keep going,” Crole grunted, when Laurel froze in shock at their appearance. Instantaneously Laurel was crashing forward next to them. Each had little shame in their quest to get to as far away as possible. They stepped on each other and hurled another out of the way as they continued their mad dash over rocky creeks, fallen trees and through tangled, twisting undergrowth. Eventually, Crole felt his legs give out under him as a hidden root tripped him forward head first into a river bed, legs sticking out at an awkward angle. Laurel clashed into his flailing ankle and brought Borg down as he clutched and grabbed onto him to break the fall. After the tumble they paused for a moment, feeling the adrenaline seep from their legs to be replaced by pain and fatigue. Shakily, Crole got to his feet and helped Laurel and Borg up. Their sprint had lasted long enough to take them a few miles from the settlement.

“What the hell was that?!” began Laurel in between breaths.

“What was what Laurel?” Borg retorted. “The weapon? The killer? Or the entire disturbing process one person intentionally ending the life of another? Either way it was definitely brutal.”

“A firearm,” spoke Crole softly, his breathing slowly getting to a regular pace. “I've seen a couple before, from travellers that claimed to have gone an unimaginable distance away, a lifetime's walk.”

“Same place that frisbees come from or that canned food that was going round a while ago?”

“Or the inflatable beach balls?” Borg contributed.

“Similar distance I'm sure,” answered Crole. “Although I doubt they came from the same people, whatever culture gave birth to the firearm must have been formidably brutal.”

“I saw one as well once.” Borg spoke quietly. “Never realised what it was or what it would be like to face in action.” He spat, his stocky build bent over as he continued wheezing.

“What the fuck was Sedrick doing?” Crole said indignantly as the other two looked at him with quizzical expressions.

“He stole the killer's hat! Then assaulted the maniac. He probably got away too since we didn't hear another shot.”

“Nutter,” Borg said appreciatively as he started walking again. “That one always finds a way to surprise.”

“What shall we do now?” Laurel questioned. “He could be after us, I don't want him within sight again!”

“We'll go west. We've still got our cargo and the white river was just beyond that village. If we find a crossing to the west we can get that clear border between us and the killer and gain access to the city in the north,” Crole decided.

“Sounds like a plan,” reasoned Borg.

“But how far west?”

“Well, judging from the sun we've been heading south west up to this point. If we go west from here for another 6 hours we should be a decent distance away I should think.”

“Unless he's going west.”

“It doesn't matter which direction we choose to go in, we will always run the risk of him going that way too. At least this way has a decent chance of us getting to his north side without running into him.”

Dusk began to settle in as the sun's light started to cascade down the horizon darkening the woodland considerably.

“He could be watching us right now and we wouldn't be aware of it,” Borg whispered glancing around warily.

“More reason to get moving in case he isn't and we can still get away,” retorted Crole as he started westward.

Damn, You Are So Lucky!

Today is your lucky day. You may have literally made the most important click of your life by selecting this blog as the next webpage to grace your computer screen.

"Why?", you may ask. "I could be looking at cats; or dogs; or my friend's social media; or naked people; or a decent band's webpage; or hacking various government's internal security systems." All those things may be important, but they don't even compare to what this blog is about... dancing.

Now I can hear your whirring brain click into place. "Dancing, of course! That makes sense." There is literally nothing more important than that. However, despite the ridiculous importance of dancing I have been noticing something terrifying at our shows, that may well shock you. Everyone seems to have forgotten how to do it. Unless flinging debris at the band counts now; or looking on with disgust; or even worse, just bobbing your head along without moving a single atom of your body at all below the neck. We appear to be in a crisis.

I'm not going to pretend that I'm the world's best dancer, or the second best or the third. As the fourth best dancer in the world though, I feel I have the expertise to guide you back from the depths of darkness where you (the world) seem to have fallen. I have an endless arsenal of dance moves at my disposal and I feel it best that I explain as many of them to you as I can. This way, next time you find yourself at some sort of music show where the beat is pumping through your limbs and you're scared and confused at what to do, you will be absolutely and completely prepared to deal with it in any situation.

So without further ado, I will go on to explain this blog's dance move: the lawnmower.

The Lawnmower

This dance move is prestigious and iconic. It has stood the test of time from all the way back when people started using lawnmowers to now. Yet it is simple and easy to employ for all you novices to dancing out there. The only thing you need to have done to be able to utilise this dance move, is used a lawnmower. That's a pretty broad spectrum of people right there. If you haven't used one and you're not in a third world nation and haven't spent your entire life in poverty, then you're a bad person. Go away and mow a lawn, now.

Now for all of you that have used a lawnmower it is practice time. There are two different parts to this move that can be employed at different times in a song. The first part: pulling the starter cord. It is time to employ that valuable mowing experience we mentioned earlier. All you have to do is: from a relaxed standing pose, imagine you have a lawnmower in front of you. Now, reach down (physically) and pull the imaginary lawnmower cord. Now, keep pulling. The imaginary lawnmower in question is a hunk of junk so you're going to have to keep pulling that starter chord over and over in time to the music. Do it for as long as you feel is best, but I like to go for a verse at least. Occasionally, i'll stop and kick the imaginary lawnmower (also in time with the music), before going back to pulling the chord.

Ok, now part 2. This is where your frustration is finally released and you get to mow. It's usually good to transition to part 2 when there is a transition in the song, maybe going from verse to chorus. Now, keeping in time with the music your going to pull one last time, give a single satisfied nod, then begin to mow stepping in time. Mow your way around the dance floor, which is now a lawn, before the imaginary mower inevitable breaks down again and you go back to pulling the chord.

And that's it. Completely simple and easy to do. You can keep repeating it for as many songs as you wish, it'll just keep on going, as it's imaginary. I realise that the world will need many more dance moves as it is completely and utterly void of them at the moment, but for the present this is a good starter. Practice it everywhere you can and you'll get it in no time: you could lawnmower your way to work; through a boring meeting; to the shops -wherever! Needless to say, I will be very disappointed and enraged if there is not a vast increase in people doing this within a realistic time-frame of this post inevitably going super-viral. Have fun!

Lyrics - Icebreaker

I feel like it's time to talk about lyrics. Or rather, my lyrics. Or rather, what the hell I was thinking when I wrote my lyrics. For a lot of songs out there, it seems there are many different, valid interpretations for what a song is prattling on about. For ours I would definitely encourage that and if people feel a song is about something the writer didn't intend, then go with it. In the end when a song is being listened to it's the meaning for the listener that is actually important. Yet, I know for some people that understanding the original intent behind the song is important, so here is my attempt to explain Icebreaker..

Now it's important to note that a lot of the lyrics I write are very intuitive, so there are many cases where I haven't realised what a song was about until the Bridge started forming, then I'd have an aha! moment and realise what I'd been on about up to that point. Icebreaker wasn't like that.. and it wasn't called Icebreaker until recently (all hail working name "Dynamic Song').

I started writing the lyrics for Icebreaker in the darkened, dingy depths of a student house in Leicester, fondly referred to as 'Edward House'. The guitar was already drafted out as per usual before I begin lyrics and I was watching an anime called 'Soul Eater'. Specifically, I was wondering what traits I found inspiring in a character called 'Blair'.  If your reading this and you haven't seen Soul Eater I recommend you do (ignore the nude scenes), if you have seen Soul Eater you will know that Blair is a magical cat that can turn into a human. So this is where the beginnings of the song come from.. a magical cat.

Although, not exactly. It was more what I found inspiring in Blair, which is a character that has an uncanny ability to have fun and focus on "living in the moment" as it were. Not on some great career path or love pursuit or divine mission or whatever, just simply being themselves and enjoying life in the best way they can, for now. So a song came from that that celebrates the people in life who are exceptional at having fun and letting go, in the same way that people who are exceptional at motivating themselves or love or succeeding in more traditional ways are celebrated.

That may not make sense, I'm not sure but basically the song outlines the thoughts and feelings of someone inspiring in this way, in the sense that some people can be inspiring for being strong, smart or caring, who I would want to emulate. It starts with an imagined scenario where this fictional character wakes up after a night where they were embarrassed and hurt and how they dealt with that. Then goes on to explain there reasons for the way they act. "And I know I may have hesitations about wasting time after new sensations" - this line refers to the time that is "wasted" chasing after fun and the pressure they take from others to do something more tangibly worthwhile. "I'm just a debug away from new sensations" - refers to the need to get rid of any beliefs that are preventing them from new experiences. A lot of the song talks about overcoming a struggle to let themselves pursue what they truly value, despite that not being seen as an important goal in their life and despite being informed there are realities which they need to address and pursue: like getting rich or getting married. It's an Icebreaker in the sense that it's almost as if this person is introducing themselves and what they're about to someone they've just met.

Anyway sorry if I've confused you, the song is open to interpretation and is a celebration of these traits, I'm not saying everyone should emulate them but that I'm glad there are people that do, as being exceptional at having fun is important.

Here are the lyrics for Icebreaker:

Icebreaker

Verse 1

Strip off, this old lost love,

Take on, the world like I knew I would,

It’s an irony line, I don’t wanna make you jealous,

I’ve taken time, to love like no-one ever,

Look in the mirror, I see nothing perfect,

But that smile, knew it was worth it,

To hit the ground last night knowing the risks,

A tip-top way to marry a tiff,

Pre-chorus

And I know I might have hesitations,

About wasting time after new sensations,

It’s not that I’m scared of me,

It’s that I take my time clearing these realities,

Chorus

I’m just a debug away from new sensations,

It takes a long, long time to fill it with my expectations,

I’m not worried about my life, I know that everything’s alright,

In fact I could stand here all day, running around after nothing today,

Verse 2

Stretch out, any tear toxic garbage,

Roll away, it’s my new day!

I run around like I’m nothing else,

And take the time to enjoy myself,

It’s my time to shine as I wish,

It’s my life to do as I see fit,

And I know I can take it slow or fast,

Who knows? How long I’ll last?

Pre-Chorus

Chorus

Bridge

Alright, I just said,

Some thoughts that whirl around inside my head,

And as I take my time to share my life,

I'll find a clue that leads to extraordinary things,

Or I'll tell you a lie and see if you believe,

It seems I run,

On expectation,

It seems I run,

On expectation,

Chorus

Police Thieves and Merchants - Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Can We Move?

The four thieves had been walking for miles, completely separated from the rest of their “band”. Each individually contemplated leaving the others to go alone and each realised they didn't want to. The large pine trees rose up around them, reducing the sky to splinters of sunlight shining through the tree-tops. All four remained fairly unaware of the land yet felt at home in it's wild and mysterious nature, the peaceful quiet around them giving their journey a slightly mystical quality.

“How far north is this city?” the youngest of the thieves questioned. He had light hair, was fairly tall, though not as imposing as Crole, and displayed a curious and sly nature in his movements as he explored his surroundings.

“Stop asking questions and get a move on,” answered Borg: a small, squat man approaching middle age. He wore a ruffled, dark, brown beard with a long ponytail swinging down his back. He had also constantly worn a scowl over the course of their collaborative get rich quick scheme, Sedrick noted with mild interest.

“We'll know when we get out of this forest.” The darkened trees that impenetrably surrounded them reinforced Borg's mood. Alone without the rest of the band, they stood less of a chance of finding this supposed city in the north where the purses of the wealthy eagerly awaited them. In all honesty they had never these cities before. The only resemblance of a city they knew of came on the coast to the south of their land, still far enough away for them to not be overly familiar with such a sizeable settlement. They were used to living in a land similar to this dotted with trees, hills and small settlements.

Just such a settlement came crawling into view within an hour as the trees that clamoured around the thieves began to thin and spread apart to form a clearing with a village at the far end from the thieves approach. Upon further inspection, 'village' proved too generous a word to describe it, it was more a small collection of houses perched on the edge of the clearing. Nevertheless, it provided an opportunity to the thieves for food either through money, guile or the provision of a small service for the inhabitants. Sedrick quickly opted for guile and disappeared into the tree-line. As always he wanted to see on what adventure his unique skills could take him and far he could push them. The others left him to pursue food through another means. They stood discussing the situation within the forest, just out of sight of the small cluster of buildings.

“What money do we have?” Borg queried, looking up at Crole.

“A little... enough for food certainly but we don't know how many days we'll be on this trek,” was the hesitant answer.

“I'm starving, I'm up for money if it's quickest..”

“And we don't want to be around if Sedrick gets caught...” chipped in Laurel.

“He's not stupid Laurel..”

“Then he can get my dinner.”

“Just fucking decide already,” snapped Borg.

“Do you need us to decide for you, because I think that requires some serious consideration.”

“You do know I have killed before Laurel.”

“So you keep telling us master murderer but I fail to care,” Laurel smirked honestly. He didn't care, in fact there was only one member of their foursome who had never killed – and that wasn't Laurel.

Before Borg could retaliate Crole said matter of factly:

“Look, if we're doing this together let's just vote on it and do whatever comes top.”

“Money,” Borg spoke instantly and Crole shifted uneasily.

“The money will need to last a while.”

“Service” stated Laurel, not realizing in his need to annoy that he wasn't satisfying his own hunger pangs.

After Laurel made his decision a harmless, innocent woodcutter emerged from the buildings opposite the huddle of thieves. They looked up, sensing the movement within the still, tranquil scene. Thunk after thunk resounded around the clearing as the stranger merrily hacked at his wood. Borg glanced at Crole who frowned at Laurel and let out a sigh.

“Fine, money it is. Let's get some food and shelter.”

Immediately, Borg strode from the tree-line towards the chopping sound. The woodcutter stayed focused on his work and didn't notice as Borg continued towards him. Thunk, thunk, thunk the work was consistent, practised and cheerful as Crole and Laurel followed Borg across the clearing, feeling the grass sweep gently against their dark trousers. He didn't look up once. Thunk and thunk, he could do this for days, the man was a pro- content in his simple, harmless life. Thunk...thunk... this happy chopping put a spring in Borg's step, each of which brought him closer to the promise of delicious dinner. It had an honest tone to it he thought, reflected in the peaceful, simple scenery that surrounded the workplace and sent the noise ricocheting back at them. One more thunk and the worker looked up, staring straight at Borg. There was the softest of clicks followed by a great, sudden bang echoing into the thieves ears with more force than they had ever known. An echo which continued with sudden, epic force onwards around the forest as the woodcutter's head exploded.

Kendra was strolling along the forest path as a colourful variety of scattered leaves fell before her, clutching at her boot as she passed by. Sandra hopped after her, a messy debris left on the forest floor as she passed.

“Where are we Sandra?” Kendra asked, a tone of authority in her voice.

“You know I know where I am.”

“Where are we Sandra? What would you call this collection of trees thrusting up out of this muddy surface we call the ground?” Kendra continued regardless.

“I have trouble focusing, I've made you aware of that in the past..”

“That's not an answer Sandra,” Kendra stated unhelpfully.

“A forest.”

“A forest! Fucking brilliant Sandra! Now, what do people tend to do in a forest?”

“Chop wood.”

“Something to do with animals Sandra,” Kendra persisted in her unhelpful, authoritative, exaggerated tone.

“Watch the birds.”

“Your not getting the game Sandra, I ask you a question and you tell me what we both know I want to hear.”

“Hunt.”

“And what do hunters leave?”

“Traps,” Kendra said in a resigned tone.

“Now you know! Now you know Sandra. After this lesson how can you possibly manage to wander into a trap again!” Kendra finished, her voice brimming with sarcasm.

“My leg hurts.”

Kendra quickly glanced down, her attention from the path ahead briefly interrupted before quickly focusing back.

“That's what snares do I'm afraid, but you're up and you're walking with bearable pain so that's good enough for me to keep chasing after those thieves. That item our clients want back is clearly precious and could cause more trouble for us if we let just anyone get their hands on it.”

Sandra kept moving, contemplating whether she should mention that she hadn't heard the description of this mysterious, precious item. She thought better of it, refusing to give Kendra another reason to humiliate her. Her loose, cropped hair drooped down over her face as she looked up at the sun. Still plenty of day left, as long as it continued to act normally. There was a general buzz in the back of her mind, as she guessed there was among everyone's, as to what had happened to the sun. The possibilities of why it had disappeared were endless to her, so she had decided to focus on hoping that nothing dangerous would come of it and try not to let it bother her too much. The conflicting theories of the merchants amused her still though, as her lip curled in spite of the stinging area where the snare had wickedly clawed into her left calf.

A few hours later the stinging had eased and she had promoted herself to hobbling over half-hopping/ half – lurching up the path.

“Kendra may moan a lot but at least her partner had decent first aid skills”, she mused as the path evened out after another hill. The woodland continued to stretch out before them, continually littering the path with the colourful leaves. Her reverie was smashed as she heard strained voices further up to the left of the track. Kendra didn't hear, she in turn was wondering if she should call a halt for the day so Sandra's leg could heal better, when she quickly shot her arm out- tensed horizontally to the left. Sandra instantly thumped into it and collapsed back onto the floor.

“Pit trap,” Kendra stated. She had only just seen it at the last moment before she herself had triggered it, the slightest of patterns in the leaves revealing that they had intentionally been arranged. It was huge, covering almost the entire path. Most likely designed for a bear she thought, slightly confused.

“There are voices,” a voice murmured from the floor.

“Which way?” Kendra asked, trusting her partners ears without question.

Sandra got up and motioned to go quietly indicating where the sounds were coming from. She had to be guided by Kendra around the trap for fear of worsening her leg. Once they were beyond it Sandra crept forward confidently and silently through the trees, Kendra rustling quietly just a few steps behind, her ears pricking up as the voices became louder the closer they came.

They were coming from a clearing where three men surrounded another on the floor with knives in hand. The man on the ground had deep cut marks and bruises where he had been gruesomely assaulted by his assailants. Kendra wondered how he managed to keep himself from falling unconscious as he looked up, blood oozing from a cut on his lower lip.

“Tell us where to go!” one of the knife wielding maniacs commanded, blood dripping from his knife onto the tranquil forest floor. The scene looked horrific, but Sandra did note at least that the injuries were still relatively minor on the victim, if they could just get him away he should be able to make it to the nearest medical attention.

“We have to intervene,” she whispered to Kendra, focusing on keeping her breathing subdued and quiet. Kendra had already formulated a plan, as well as noticed the purple wine jars stacked next to the thieves' baggage and supplies.

“Make your away around silently to the opposite end of the clearing,” she ordered at a minute volume with eyes focused in anticipation. “Once you're there stay out of sight and ready to make your move. I'll try and draw them away, once I do get the prisoner and the wine and head north. There's a village a few miles from here, do you remember?”

“Batesmoor.”

“Correct, take the merchant there with the wine, I'll follow you once I've gotten rid of these... scum.”

Sandra nodded and made her way around the clearing. Her blue top and leggings contrasted amazingly with the green scenery so she kept her movements slow and precise around a path which kept her far enough from the clearing to remain hidden. Meanwhile, the merchant continued to be questioned and take a beating. Kendra lost sight of Sandra as she got closer to the opposite side, it was now up to her intuition to time her move just when her partner was in position. She ran through the plan once more in her head. It could be better, but she trusted in her speed, intelligence and natural ability to improvise to get her out of any setbacks. The only worry was that if the thieves didn't go for her. The seconds ticked past and as the thieves moved in for another attack on the gentleman she decided to move.

She stepped into the clearing perpendicular to the thieves' vision the jagged edges of the stones she clutched digging into her skin. Being so intent on their prisoner she had a wine jar under her arm and a stone ready to hurl before they noticed her. Her first stone crashed into the nearest thief's face as he turned to face the threat. He was tall and gangly in shape lurching backwards as he yelled out, a hand clasped over his face. A string of foul language erupted from the thief stooped down to cut at the victim as a stone zipped into his teeth. Kendra laughed merrily and galloped off into the trees. The stooped thief spat blood onto the already blood spattered floor.

“Stay here!” he shouted at the unharmed thief as he stepped forward.

“We'll go get her and she can join him,” he muttered nodding to the groaning man on the floor as he followed his taller comrade into the woodland.

The remaining thief wiped a baffled look off his face before standing guard over his prisoner, a knife at his hip Sandra noted.

“Could be worse”, she thought. “At least two of the criminals had gone after Kendra's diversion. Time to improvise, I guess..,” as she felt around for a decent grip on the large chunk of wood in her hand and glared at the thief.